One Year

It has been one year since her eye was removed. I am full of conflicted emotions today. We are lucky she is alive, that the tumor (although it filled 80% of her retina) did not touch her optic nerve (aka, pathway to her brain).

She is fierce, strong, amazing, beautiful, funny, demanding, loving, and more than I can properly put into words. I love you, my sweet baby girl.

Anger

Yes, I still hold onto the anger at the Dr. who missed the tumor in my daughter's eye. It was right there. We PAY you to do your job. Your job was to examine my baby. ALL of my baby. That tumor would have been seen when she was 3 months old (considering we have photos of it at one month). Her eye could have been saved, her life not AS threatened, if only you picked up your ophthalmoloscope and dimmed the lights to naturally dilate the eyes. Perhaps even once mentioned that it is a good idea to get a 6 month old baby's eyes checked by a pediatric optometrist. But no, you did none of that.

I question why I still have friends who know all we have been through that STILL see this Dr. She and her whole group (since we were there tons and saw different Drs and nurses) missed the TUMOR in my baby's eye. (of course it is not visible with the naked eye which is why you are provided with the instrument. It isn't a dust collector. USE IT!!!!!!)

Someday, when I can think more rationally, Dr. M. You will get a nice little letter from me.