Cancer 15 and gray hair

Okay, so we were going to see some old family friends today. I put my daughter in a really cute dress and I was going to wear something as well. Try on dress #1-fits, but I need a strapless bra, next dress. #2, can't get it over my hips, okay, pretty sure that is how I used to get this dress on, fit over head, zipper isn't close to closing. #3, fits zipped, wait a minute, I see my arm pit fat. I want to now burn dress #3. Arm pit fat is the worst. I have officially gained what I call the "cancer 15." Similar to the freshman 15, these 15 pounds have been adding up over the course of the past 6 months since my daughter's diagnosis. I know I am making bad food decisions. I know it. I don't know why I am doing it. I love veggies and fruit, I am just not eating them. I am even making them for her, so what is wrong with me. I am making a pact with myself that I will start eating better from now on and continue with my running and exercising...taking her out for walks, taking the dogs out, etc. This not working thing is killing me. Weight was never an issue while I worked. Grrr.

Now, for gray hairs. These are also new since my daughter's diagnosis. THese I am enjoying. I like that I have white hairs growing from my temples (okay, just my right temple). These are war wounds. Yes, she ultimately fought the cancer but we did to. We were there with her, not sleeping, holding, consoling, etc. Her pain was our pain, her fight was also our fight. I will not dye my hair for at least another 6 months or until the novelty of my new gray wears off.

Oh and I guess we had a really really great week. I got sunburnt in February!